Experts spoke about the manifestation of the "sissy boy" syndrome at work
Emotional dependence on parents can seriously affect not only personal relationships, but also a career. The so-called "mother's son" phenomenon often manifests itself in a professional environment through avoidance of responsibility, difficulties in decision-making, and dependence on external approval. All the details are in the Izvestia article.
Patterns of behavior in a team
Independent HR expert Anna Alikova has identified the key signs by which infantilism manifests itself in the working environment. Such employees often use passive aggression instead of outright refusal and tend to delegate responsibility, masking it with phrases about the need to coordinate the approach. In conflict situations, they take the position of a victim and expect the leader to act as a rescuer.
"The attitude of such men towards their superiors is based on the projection of the maternal figure. They tend to either idealize or devalue a female leader, perceiving criticism as maternal nagging. Instead of completing tasks, an employee may make mistakes or "forget" about assignments, which is an echo of a child's desire to do things their own way in secret from their parents," the specialist explained.
How does this manifest itself at work?
Psychological dependence on parents can be identified even at the interview stage. According to Anna Alikova, non-separated candidates often show excessive gratitude for simple things and ask questions not about tasks, but about rules and "permitting authorities." They cannot stand pauses in conversation, trying to fill them with excuses, as they associate silence with their mother's displeasure.
"A story about past dismissals — there will almost always be a figure of an "unfair boss" who "didn't put anything in." Not a word about his role. This is a classic: there is no responsibility, there is only resentment against a superior," said Anna Alikova.
Another marker is a special attitude towards management. According to the expert, such employees can either idealize a female boss, expecting unconditional support, or perceive her overly critically. In relation to male managers, competition or the search for a "good father" figure is more common.
The HR expert noted that psychological lack of separation directly affects professional growth. Such employees often choose not strategically advantageous career solutions, but those options that seem to be the safest.
The expert also draws attention to the so—called delayed life syndrome - the constant expectation of the moment when the right to ambitious steps will appear. This prevents a person from applying for higher positions, changing their career trajectory and taking on managerial functions. Even after being promoted, such employees often face difficulties in managing the team: they either become overly rigid, compensating for internal insecurity, or, conversely, avoid difficult decisions.
Causes of addiction formation
Dmitry Yagudin, founder and head of the D.R. Yagudin International Neurouniversity, Doctor of Psychology, said that the roots of the problem are formed in early childhood. The key period is the age from one to three years, when a child learns to show independence and forms a so—called leadership position. If at this moment the parents suppress the initiative with excessive control or, conversely, do everything for the child, the ability to autonomy develops inadequately.
The expert identifies two main scenarios. The first is parenting through emotional pressure, when the child's desires are subordinated to the mother's condition. The second is hyperprotection, in which the child does not face the need to act independently and make decisions. According to Yagudin, both scenarios lead to dependent behavior and constant search for external support in adulthood.
Why does it affect relationships
The psychologist notes that an emotionally unseparated man often continues to focus on his mother's figure even into adulthood.
"If part of a man's emotional involvement still belongs to the mother, the partner inevitably faces the feeling that there is always a third person in the relationship. This is a story about an unformed internal autonomy. Such dependence can manifest itself both in a real attachment to the mother's opinion, and in the transfer of this model to partnerships and work communications," the psychologist explained.
At the same time, experts emphasize that the problem concerns not only men. As Anna Alikova notes, female non-separation is more often socially approved and therefore less noticeable, although the consequences can be no less serious.
Experts agree that the key to solving the problem is to develop internal autonomy, the ability to make decisions and take responsibility for one's own choices. Without this, dependence on external approval can slow down both career development and building mature relationships for years.
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